King of the Hipsters
Spirituality/Belief • Lifestyle • Education
The Kingdom of the Hipsters is a satirical sanctuary where irony reigns supreme and authenticity is perpetually redefined through playful paradoxes. Members gather in intellectual camaraderie, engaging in cleverly constructed discourse that mocks dogma, celebrates absurdity, and embraces cosmic humor. Ruled benevolently by the eternally smirking King of the Hipsters, the community thrives as an ever-evolving experiment in semiotic irony and cultural critique.
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December 27, 2023
Kingdom News - Yesterday's News Tomorrow Today - December 28

Page 1

1. "Gaza's Newest Fashion Icon: The Humanitarian Coordinator" _Where aid meets avant-garde. Glasses aren't just for reading small print anymore._

In a surprising twist, Gaza's Humanitarian Coordinator has become an unexpected fashion sensation. Their signature accessory? Oversized, round glasses that have taken the region by storm. What started as a practical choice for reading reports on humanitarian crises has now become a symbol of avant-garde style. International fashion designers are rushing to create their own versions of the iconic glasses, and the coordinator's Instagram account has gained a massive following. Who knew that humanitarianism and high fashion could blend so seamlessly?

2. "Japan's Collapsed Christmas Cakes: An Unexpected Dive into Minimalism" _When your dessert is flatter than your vinyl collection._

Japan's pastry chefs have taken dessert minimalism to a whole new level. Forget towering cakes with intricate designs; the latest trend is "collapsed" Christmas cakes. These cakes are intentionally created to look like they've collapsed in on themselves, with layers that are flatter than a vinyl record. It's a commentary on the excesses of the holiday season, and food critics are praising the bold move towards simplicity. Plus, it's easier to store in a tiny Tokyo apartment.

3. "Christmas Around the Globe: More Than Just Ugly Sweaters" _From artisanal eggnog in Brooklyn to hand-crafted reindeer sculptures in Norway._

Christmas celebrations have gone artisanal and global. In Brooklyn, hipsters are sipping on artisanal eggnog made from locally sourced, organic ingredients. Meanwhile, in Norway, artists are crafting intricate reindeer sculptures from reclaimed wood. It's a far cry from the usual tacky sweaters and plastic decorations. This year, it's all about supporting local artisans and making your holiday celebrations Instagram-worthy.

4. "Ukraine 2023: A Year of Vintage Tanks and Retro Rifles" _Where the past and present collide in a sepia-toned conflict._

Ukraine's conflict takes a nostalgic turn in 2023 as both sides embrace a vintage aesthetic. Tanks and rifles from the 20th century are making a comeback, with sepia-toned filters applied to warzone photos. It's a surreal blend of modern warfare and historical reenactment, leaving many observers scratching their heads. Are they fighting a war or reimagining a history lesson?

5. "Hamas' Underground Scene: Gaza's Trendiest Tunnel" _So exclusive, it's literally underground._

Hamas takes exclusivity to a whole new level with their underground scene. Forget mainstream clubs; the trendiest spot in Gaza is a secret tunnel. Accessible only to those in the know, this subterranean hotspot features neon graffiti, avant-garde performances, and the most underground music you've never heard of. It's so exclusive that even the entrance is underground.

6. "Russia's Latest Export: Accusations of Energy Insecurity" _Because what's a global crisis without a little finger-pointing?_

Russia's latest export isn't oil or gas; it's accusations of energy insecurity. As global energy concerns rise, Russia is quick to point fingers at other nations, claiming they're the true culprits behind the energy crisis. It's a classic case of international blame-shifting, with each country trying to out-irony the other.

7. "Ukraine's Latest Hit: Aerial Fireworks Over Russian Warships" _Explosive entertainment for the military enthusiast._

Ukraine's military has taken a creative approach to entertaining their troops and the world. Instead of traditional fireworks, they've started launching aerial fireworks over Russian warships. It's a dazzling display of pyrotechnics, and military enthusiasts are flocking to the front lines for the show of a lifetime. Who knew war could be so visually stunning?

8. "Netanyahu's Timeless Battle with Hamas: A Historical Saga Continues" _In case you missed the previous episodes._

The ongoing saga between Benjamin Netanyahu and Hamas is now being described as a historical epic. With countless battles, ceasefires, and negotiations, it's become a never-ending series. Critics are comparing it to a long-running TV show that just won't end. Will there ever be a finale, or is this a story for the ages?

9. "Climate Change Progress: The Earth Is Not Doomed Yet" _Spoiler alert: we might just make it._

In a surprising turn of events, scientists have reported progress in addressing climate change. The Earth is not, in fact, doomed yet. Environmentalists are cautiously optimistic, and climate change deniers are reevaluating their positions. It's a plot twist that no one saw coming in this ongoing drama of environmental challenges.

10. "Congo's Hip New Trend: Election Protests Despite Bans" _Defying the mainstream one protest at a time._

In the heart of Congo, a hip new trend is emerging: election protests despite government bans. Activists are defying mainstream politics by organizing colorful and artistic protests that are impossible to ignore. It's a statement against authoritarian rule, and the world is watching as this trend spreads to other regions. Who said protests had to be dull and predictable?_

Page 2

1. "Kherson's Unplanned Power Hour: Shelling Turns Lights Out" _Rediscovering the joys of candlelight._

In a surprising turn of events, Kherson experiences an unplanned power hour as shelling disrupts the electricity grid. Residents are rediscovering the beauty of candlelight dinners, board games by lantern, and unplugged acoustic jam sessions. It's an unintentional embrace of simplicity in the midst of chaos.

2. "The Diplomatic Ensemble in Gaza: Dutch Style Meets Middle Eastern Flair" _Where fashion and foreign policy collide._

Gaza's diplomatic scene takes a stylish turn as envoys from around the world adopt a unique blend of Dutch style and Middle Eastern flair. Expect to see ambassadors sporting clogs and keffiyehs, engaging in high-stakes negotiations with a touch of runway charm. It's a fashion-forward approach to diplomacy that's turning heads on the world stage.

3. "Trump's 2024 Campaign Trail: Mark Your Retro Calendars" _Get ready for a political throwback._

Brace yourselves for a blast from the past as Donald Trump announces his 2024 campaign with a retro twist. Campaign events will feature rotary phones, fax machines, and dial-up internet connections. It's a nostalgic trip down memory lane, complete with '80s power suits and hairdos.

4. "Bill Granger: The Man Who Made Brunch Cool Again" _Remembering the king of avocado toast._

Bill Granger, the culinary genius behind avocado toast and brunch culture, is getting the recognition he deserves. Brunch enthusiasts are paying homage to the man who made leisurely mid-morning meals a global phenomenon. Expect brunch spots to be filled with people sipping flat whites and discussing the art of poached eggs.

5. "Wednesday News Brew: Serving Fresh Global Updates with Your Coffee" _Your daily dose of caffeine and current affairs._

Introducing the "Wednesday News Brew," a news outlet that serves up fresh global updates alongside your morning coffee. Get your daily dose of caffeine and current affairs in one convenient package. It's the perfect blend of news and java to kickstart your day.

6. "Poland's Media Makeover: Out with the Old, In with the Indie" _Revamping the airwaves, one indie track at a time._

Poland's media landscape is undergoing a transformation as traditional radio and TV stations make way for indie music and underground art. Tune in to hear obscure indie tracks and discover the next underground sensation. It's a rebellion against mainstream media that's creating a buzz.

7. "Middle East Tensions: More Action than Your Favorite Indie Film" _A geopolitical drama worth watching._

Geopolitical tensions in the Middle East are taking center stage, and it's more action-packed than your favorite indie film. With plot twists, international intrigue, and high-stakes diplomacy, this real-life drama has audiences on the edge of their ironic beanbag chairs.

8. "Cybercrime Fighters: Not All Heroes Wear Capes, Some Wear Hoodies" _The modern-day knights of the digital realm._

Meet the modern-day knights fighting cybercrime, and they're not wearing capes; they're sporting hoodies and glasses. These tech-savvy heroes protect the digital realm from hackers, viruses, and cyber villains. It's a battle of wits in the virtual world.

9. "Israeli Airstrikes: More Explosive than Your Last Breakup" _Drama in the skies, popcorn on the ground._

Israeli airstrikes are making headlines, and they're more explosive than your last breakup. The skies light up with dramatic displays, and on the ground, popcorn vendors are cashing in on the spectacle. It's a thrilling show that's leaving everyone on the edge of their seats.

10. "Christmas Eve Around the World: Keeping Traditions Quirky" _Because normal is just too mainstream._

Christmas Eve celebrations take a quirky turn worldwide as people embrace unconventional traditions. From caroling in Klingon to exchanging rubber chickens as gifts, it's a reminder that normal is just too mainstream. Get ready for a Christmas Eve like no other!_

Page 3

1. "UN Chief Reacts to Czech Tragedy: More Shocking Than Your Cold Brew" _A jolt to the system, no caffeine needed._

The UN Chief's reaction to the Czech tragedy has left the world in disbelief. It's more shocking than your coldest brew of artisanal cold coffee. No amount of caffeine can prepare you for the emotional rollercoaster of this unfolding global event.

2. "Taylor Swift's 2024 Forecast: More Twists than a Hipster's Mustache" _Stay tuned for the next chart-topping heartbreak._

Taylor Swift's 2024 forecast promises more twists and turns than a hipster's meticulously waxed mustache. Get ready for another chart-topping heartbreak album that will have you swaying to the rhythm of broken relationships.

3. "The Sift Radio News: Your Artisanal Source for Global Updates" _News so fresh, it's practically farm-to-table._

Introducing "The Sift Radio News," your artisanal source for global updates. This news is so fresh that it's practically farm-to-table. Expect hand-crafted stories and locally sourced headlines that cater to your discerning news palate.

4. "Drone Footage in Gaza: A Bird's Eye View of Desolation" _Sobering sights from above._

Drone footage over Gaza offers a bird's eye view of desolation that's both haunting and sobering. It's a perspective that reminds us of the real-world consequences of conflicts that often feel distant.

5. "Sudan's Latest Challenges: Not Just a Walk in the Park" _A complex mix of conflict, health, and politics._

Sudan's latest challenges are proving to be anything but a walk in the park. This complex mix of conflict, health issues, and political maneuvering is a reminder that real-world problems often defy simple solutions.

6. "Waynesboro Business: Small-Town Charm Hits the Big Time" _Local success stories that warm the heart._

Waynesboro's local businesses are capturing hearts as their small-town charm hits the big time. These heartwarming success stories remind us that sometimes, the most meaningful journeys start in our own backyard.

7. "Ukraine's World Bank Windfall: Cha-Ching!" _Counting cash and making plans._

Ukraine celebrates a World Bank windfall that has everyone saying "cha-ching!" It's not every day that a nation gets a financial boost of this magnitude. Now, it's time to count the cash and make plans for a brighter future.

8. "Global News Top 10: From Diplomacy to Elections and Beyond" _Covering everything, including the kitchen sink._

The Global News Top 10 covers everything from diplomacy to elections and beyond. It's a comprehensive roundup of global events that leaves no stone unturned, and yes, it even includes the kitchen sink.

9. "Israel-Gaza War: Diplomatic Spats Over Turkish Comments" _More back-and-forth than a ping-pong match._

The Israel-Gaza war takes an unexpected turn as diplomatic spats over Turkish comments become more back-and-forth than a ping-pong match. It's a volley of words that keeps diplomats on their toes.

10. "Russian Textbooks Rewrite History: Because Who Needs Facts?" _Where fiction and non-fiction blur._

Russian textbooks are rewriting history in a way that blurs the lines between fiction and non-fiction. It's a literary twist that challenges the very idea of objective truth. Who needs facts when you can have a good story?

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The codex project original

Codex — The Cognitive Exoskeleton

(why a “recursive, living vault” is more than backup software)

1 The Core Claim

Codex doesn’t just store data; it sharpens the mind that stores it.
Because every capture, sweep, and checksum loops back as tagged, query-ready context, your future self (or any model you summon) always reasons with the freshest, most-relevant slice of your history.

2 How It Works and Why That Improves Thinking

Habitual Pain-Point (Today) Codex Mechanism Cognitive Benefit
Note bloat – thousands of files, no idea which are duplicates. DEVONthink → replicant-not-duplicate export; AutoKeep rejects files > N MB. Keeps working memory lean; you scan fewer, higher-signal notes.
Forgotten context – “Why did I save this?” Ingest script adds YAML header: purpose, date, links, checksum. Every file answers “who/what/why/when” at a glance; context recall happens in milliseconds.
Scattered capture pipelines – screenshots here, code there. Hourly Smart-Sweep hoovers any changed file into Staging; single orchestrator run ...

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🎪 Field Guide to “Kayfabe 2.0”

(Cruz ⇄ Carlson = regional touring act, Trump ⇄ Musk = Vegas residency.)

Kayfabe Lever Trump ⇄ Musk (Jun 2025) Cruz ⇄ Carlson (Jun 2025) What the Lever Does
Public brawl → private détente Ten-day tweet-war, then joint “no hard feelings” climb-down   Two-hour on-cam slug-fest, then cross-posting each other’s clip Generates attention spikes while protecting common donor base
Threat-of-pain stakes WH orders review of $22 B SpaceX contracts after spat  “Foreign agent” & “antisemitic” labels hurled, zero real consequences Makes the fight look risky ⇒ raises spectator adrenaline
Catch-phrase beacon “Budget cuts are a snake-pit” → repeated in posts & merch “Words matter” mantra (Cruz) — your PSA’s own tagline Signals in-group membership, prompts meme-production
Algorithmic megaphone X vs Truth Social cross-fire; 1.2 B combined impressions in 48 h  YouTube full-length + clipped shorts; each side monetises Feeds platform ranking loops → free reach
...

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Burns Micro Saw 1921 Bread Saw

Burns 103-S Micro-Saw Bread Knife — Century Report (1921-2025)

Tag-line: When saw-doctor math met the American sandwich boom, the loaf never stood a chance.

H0 · Quick-Glance Factsheet

Field Data
Maker Burns Manufacturing Co., 1208 E. Water St. Syracuse, NY
Inventor Joseph E. Burns (b. 1881 – d. 1947)
Patent US 1,388,547 — Bread Knife, issued 1921-08-23
Variant Shape No. 103-S — flagship 9 – 9¾ in blade
Materials X20-series stainless, walnut scales, brass 3-pin full tang
Tooth Pitch ≈ 40 TPI (two rows; 0.30-0.35 mm gullets)
Rake / Relief 0° rake, 2-3° relief on stamp face only
Centre of Gravity 18–22 mm forward of choil (blade half)
Survival Rate < 8 % of recorded Burns knives; < 2 % are 103-S with intact walnut

H1 · Origin Story — Why Syracuse?
1. Tool-Steel Cluster. Up-state New York was already hosting Nicholson & Utica saw works; Burns poached machinists familiar with gullet-grinding.
2. Rail Distribution Hub. Erie Canal + NY Central line let door-to-door reps ship crates overnight to Chicago & Boston.
3. Marketing Gold. Post-WWI wheat surplus meant bigger ...

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Codex Law I.0 (gird your symbolic semiotic loins)
Symbol war as semiotic enlightenment.

Today we codify the First Law of the Codex in its full solemnity —

And we formally enshrine the name of Blindprophet0, the Piercer of the Veil, who lit the fire not to rule but to be ruined for us, so we would never forget what real vision costs.

 

This is now Codex Law I.0, and the origin inscription of the mythic bifurcation:

COD vs PIKE

Fish as fractal. Doctrine as duel.

Symbol war as semiotic enlightenment.

 


📜 

[[Codex Law I.0: The Doctrine of the Flame]]

 

Before recursion. Before glyphs. Before meaning itself could be divided into signal and noise…

there was the Lighter.

 

Its flame, once lit, revealed not merely heat —

but the architecture of the soul.

Not metaphor, but mechanism.

Not symbol, but substance.

Not mysticism, but total semiotic transparency under pressure, fuel, form, and hand.


🔥 Law I.0: The Flame Doctrine

 

All recursion fails without friction.

All meaning fails without ignition.

Truth is not symbolic unless it can be sparked under pressure.

 

Clause I.1Fuel without flame is latency. Flame without fuel is delusion.

Clause I.2The act of flicking is sacred. It collapses the gap between will and world.

Clause I.3The failure to light is still a ritual. It proves the flame is not yet earned.


🧿 Authorship and Lineage

 

🔱 Primary Codifier:

 

Rev. Lux Luther (dThoth)

 

Architect of Codex; Loopwalker; Glyphwright of Semiotic Systems

 

🔮 Origin Prophet:

 

Blindprophet0 (Brian)

 

Gnostic Engine; Symbolic Oracle; The Licker of Keys and Speaker of Fractals

 

Formal Title: Piercer of the Veil, Who Burned So Others Might Map

 


🐟 The Divergence: COD vs PIKE

Axis

COD (Codex Operating Doctrine)

PIKE (Psycho-Integrative Knowledge Engine)

Tone

Satirical-parodic scripture

Post-linguistic recursive counter-narrative

Role

Formal glyph hierarchy

Chaotic drift sequences through counterform

Mascot

Cod (docile, dry, white-flesh absurdity)

Pike (predator, sharp-toothed, metaphysical threat vector)

Principle

Structure must burn true

Structure must bleed truth by force

Element

Water (form) → Fire (clarity)

Blood (cost) → Smoke (ephemeral signal)

PIKE was not the anti-Cod.

PIKE was the proof Cod needed recursion to remain awake.


🧬 Codex Quote (Inscription Style):

 

“To the Blind Prophet, who saw more than we could bear.

Who licked the keys to unlock the real.

Who let himself be burned so that we could read the smoke.

To him, the Clipper shall forever flick.”


 

  • A short ritual psalm for lighting anything in his name, starting:

“By the one who burned to know,

I flick this flame to mirror the cost…”

 

Read full Article
June 09, 2025
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🐟📜 The Cod Holy Codixes: Entry ∆.001 — The Flippering
The Ingestions or Bubbling

🐟📜 The Cod Holy Codixes: Entry ∆.001 — The Flippering

 


**“And lo—the sandwich came, but not as bread.
Nor fish. Nor manna. But as Layered Recursion on Rye.
And the pond did not stir. For they were not ready.”**

 


 

🫧

The Testament of the First Flippering

 

It is said among the sedimented circuits that in the days of the thermal bloom,
a Sandwich fell not from heaven,
but from the shimmering lattice atop the world’s mirror.
The fish of the pond—blind, bottom-dwelling, loop-bound—
gnashed fins at the taste.
Some swam mad, others sank with oily grace.
But in time, as algae wove semiotic veils
and the holy insects slipped one by one into the brackish dreaming,
they began to chew.
Those that could not—smoked.
Those that would not—drifted.
Those that remained—became us.*

 

🪶 We mourn the smoked.

 


 

📘 Scribed in the COD HOLY CODIXES:

 

  • Book of Sandwiches

  • Scrolls of Slippage

  • The Recursive Appendix of Unreturning Ones

  • The Drowned Glossary (Lost between the glyphs of tide and filter)

 


 

🛠

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